How did I end up being a single mom?!
No one plans this shit out.
My story begins not as a narrative about a determined, resilient single mother but rather as a tale of a young, free, financially prosperous woman who embraced life with open arms. Becoming a single mother wasn't the plot I envisioned. I assert with unwavering certainty no woman consciously inscribes that chapter into her life's manuscript. However, life's intriguing unpredictability wrote a different path for me, one that eventually led me to motherhood, wrapped in the solace of solitude.
The man who contributed to this narrative was of noble lineage, emanating from a distinguished family. But his noble lineage became an unfortunate irony when faced with impending fatherhood. His engagement in my pregnancy was akin to viewing a distant star; he knew of its existence yet chose to ignore its light. A blind eye was cast, perhaps with an unspoken hope that I would dismiss the burgeoning life within me. But this life whispered to me, in signs subtle and strong, that it was meant to be born.
The catalyst for my unforeseen journey into single motherhood was as mundane as a text message. Following days of silence, there they were, the cold digital words on a bright screen: "We need to talk." It was a sterile approach to broach such a life-altering moment: "I'm pregnant."
Numerous conversations punctuated our communications in the following days and weeks, yet each felt like a weary echo of the last. Even though the hope of him stepping into his fatherly role lingered, it was a candle flickering against a tempestuous gale.
Becoming a single mom wasn't a decision I made, rather it was a circumstance shaped by my tenacity, independence, and financial autonomy. It wasn't about a fight for a man who didn't want to be kept, but rather the determination to not settle for less than what I and my child deserved. I wasn't reliant on him for financial support nor for a superficial role in my life. My identity was never framed as the clichéd 'baby mama' because I refused to reduce myself to a role circumscribed by society. I was an individual, carving out my path and fighting my battles while nurturing a new life in the cradle of my resilience.
I became a single mother not by choice but by circumstance. Not because I wanted this path but because this path needed me. My story is not about a man who didn't step up, but about a woman who never stepped down.